Some may say I'm a dreamer
This is the time of year when I find myself asking a lot of people Jesus’ first words in the Gospel of John, ”What are you seeking?” (John 1.38). In the Telos Community, it is a primary question, as we pause and consider, “What am I actually living for–living toward?” One-on-ones with Trinterns often get to this question. Theta Community is at the age when their orientation is still largely looking forward. “What are you seeking?” I don’t think it is an accident that these are the first words Jesus asks in the Gospel of John. It is a foundational question for people who are alive, and want to live the fully-alive life.
Pastor Christian, one of the leaders in the Lutheran Congregations in Mission for Christ (LCMC), turned the question on me yesterday. He was visiting, wanting to observe a morning with the Intern community. He and I went for a burrito from Choriman, and as we were sitting above Royal Palms, he said, “Nathan, what about you? What is your dream? What do you long for?” It took me, what felt like, less than a half-second to respond. He had touched something primal–close to my heart. And, he has that disarming manner that made me feel secure to share my deepest vocational longing.
“I want to be Trinity’s pastor and I want to help cultivate a movement of young adult discipleship communities. I have passion for both, but I don’t know how to sustain both. But, if it is God giving me this dream, it must be his problem to figure out how to make it sustainable.”
How about you? What is your longing? What are you seeking? What is your dream?
Poet John O’Donohue captures this in one of my favorite of his blessings, For Longing:
Blessed be the longing that brought you here
And quickens your soul with wonder.
May you have the courage to listen to the voice of desire
That disturbs you when you have settled for something safe.
May you have the wisdom to enter generously into your own uneaseTo discover the new direction your longing wants you to take.
May the forms of your belonging – in love, creativity, and friendship –
Be equal to the grandeur and call of your soul.
May the one you long for long for you.
May your dreams gradually reveal the destination of your desire.
May a secret providence guide your thought and nurture your feeling,
May your mind inhabit your life with which your body inhabits the world.
May your heart never be haunted by ghost structures of old damage.
May you come to accept your longing as divine urgency.May you know the urgency with which God longs for you.
Wanted to edit last sentence...didn't come out right.
Just looked at the Rule of Life online. then went back to this. I'm glad your dream is not an either or proposition with pastoring a church and the Theta community. By looking at the church, and the variety of congregants, you are looking at life as it is and teaching the Thetas that life from the Lutheran perspective has increased to include all walks of life. My dream is to be able to meet the conversations and build a vernacular that helps them to view their dreams from a "used to be" outsider.